I have been thinking a lot lately about the trials that come with parenthood. Specifically, being a parent of a toddler. Even more specifically, the parent of a toddler who acts like she is a mix of a 16 year old and a Tasmanian Devil all together. It's a whirlwind for sure.
SO. How does one navigate these trials and not lose their ever loving mind? Honestly- I have no clue. My hair falls out by the fistfuls at this point and I am not convinced it's postpartum related. (*Insert laughing/crying emoji here*) I basically survive off of coffee, Tums to counter act the acid re-flux from the coffee, and a whole lot of grace. Although- I may not seem to behave gracefully in the moment, at the end of the day, I would much rather have a messy house and a sink full of dishes than to lose my mind because I am a workoholic. (If you knew me growing up- you would probably never think that the words "Abigail Huckabee" and "Workaholic" would go hand in hand... yet, here we are.)
Mommyhood and Business Owning has taken a very free spirited, fly by the seat of her pants, zero idea of time girl and transformed her into a complete Type A personality with lists and plans and the NEED to be early to everything.
I guess I have always been a bit of a control freak. I remember the first time someone said that about me and it crushed me... I look at it now as an asset though. If I didn't know how to control certain aspects of my life, I would be even more overwhelmed and overworked than I am now. The key thing to control is knowing when to have it and when to let it go. I can confidently say that I have learned so many things are out of my control since entering parenthood, marriage, and business. I don't always like it, but I have learned it is okay to lose control every now and then. I have learned to give myself and others grace. It is still a daily struggle, but it's one I am progressing in. I am proud of that.
For instance- we had a major tropical storm roll through just a few days ago and I had zero control during that time. We were stuck inside our home for days on end... Chloe was going stir-crazy, I had a severe case of cabin-fever... and at some point... the paint got out.
Chloe, being the Tasmanian that she is, took her new found love for art and painting and went ham. She surprised me with a painting I will never forget. One that covered my Papasan chair, my patio rug, the concrete floor in my enclosed patio (now turned office), the windows, the doors... you name it. And before you start thinking "Well, that wouldn't happen if you were watching your kid" please remember that I have TWO children, one of whom still requires most of my attention, and during the time it took me to go prep a bottle, pick up Noah, and walk back out to the patio to feed him, Chloe managed this disaster. I don't know about you- but I have yet to discover the secret to being two places at once.
So- instead of freaking out, we wiped up as much paint as we could, and enjoyed a break in the storm by splashing in puddles and swimming in our clothes. Why? Because, what else could I do? I couldn't make the paint disappear... screaming at her would have done more harm than good...and as far as I know, time travel has not happened yet.
So mommas, especially my boss lady mommas, please remember that when life gets hard and you are over worked, stressed, and under appreciated- you are not alone. You can go to bed with a sink full of dishes, a house that is a mess, and a partner that may not always understand the struggle, with the peace of knowing that you are not the only one in the world who struggles. You can break the lie of perfection and defeat the feeling of needing to live a perfectly curated life. You are allowed to give yourself grace no matter what. You are worthy of a break. You are worthy of love. You are worthy of grace.
Now- go draw yourself a bath, pour a glass of your preferred beverage, pop some popcorn, eat a tub of icecream, watch a movie in bed.... do what ever makes you feel relaxed... and give yourself some grace for tonight.
"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."-Matthew 6:34
Now, here are some photos from Chloe's post paint party tropical storm puddle jumping. (say that 10 times fast!)